Those Three Words
by ThatFilmStudent
Summary: After a funeral, Sirius invites Remus back to his flat. During their activities, Sirius blurts out the three words that he hadn't told Remus before. M for sexual situations. Remus/Sirius. Prequel to 'I'll Prove It' but can be read alone.


**DISCLAIMER: I do not own these characters.**

* * *

They'd barely made it through the front door of the flat before Sirius attacked Remus' lips, pushing the other man up against the door and kissing him thoroughly with a deep-rooted need and passion. Sirius' lips moved with intent, desperate to portray how much he wanted Remus; how much he **needed** to be with Remus.

Keeping Remus pushed up against the front door, Sirius aimed for any bare skin that he could reach. He trailed his lips away from Remus' own, down across the other man's cheek and feathering gentle kisses along the strong, ever-so-slightly stubbled jawline before eventually making his way down to Remus' neck.

Remus' head fell back against the door with a quiet _thud_ , exposing more of his neck and granting Sirius easier access to it. Sirius went straight for the jugular, licking and sucking gently, and making Remus moan; the low sound reverberated through the lycanthrope's chest loudly and Sirius couldn't stop the impish smile that appeared on his face – glad that he had that effect on the other man.

Slowly, teasingly, Sirius sucked on the special spot that he knew drove Remus wild and lathered the skin, tasting Remus and feeling the growing erratic pulse pumping away beneath his mouth. Strong hands rose up and wound through his hair, tightening and encouraging Sirius as he grazed his teeth lightly across the pulse-point before quickly, and not-so-softly, biting the skin under his mouth.

"Fuck," Remus groaned, his hand tightening in Sirius' hair slightly. Sirius flicked his tongue across the reddened skin in apology for biting harder than he had intended and kissed it gently, smiling to himself as he produced an almost-growling moan from the slightly taller wizard.

Remus threaded his fingers through Sirius' hair and pulled, gently persuading the Animagus to tear his lips away from his neck and look at him. They looked at each other for a second – shaded grey meeting darkened hazel-amber – before Remus leaned down and brushed his lips against Sirius' again in an almost chaste kiss; a kiss much less needy than previous ones.

Sirius responded quickly but whimpered as he felt Remus pull away slightly. He opened his eyes, not realising they'd shut, and caught the lycanthrope's gaze. Remus licked his lips, temporarily drawing Sirius' attention to the red kiss-swollen lips and making him lean forward again for a quick peck before he met Remus' gaze again.

"Bedroom?" Remus suggested, murmuring against Sirius's lips breathlessly and sending an electric jolt of arousal through the Animagus right down to his toes.

The look in those amazing hazel-amber eyes only served to increase the charge Sirius felt and made him go a little weak at the knees. He held onto Remus' suit jacket and coat tighter for support, keeping himself upright. The look in Remus' eyes was one of **want** and **need** and **passion** but also one of **adoration** and **care** and... **love**?

The thought sent a shiver down Sirius' spine and his hands unintentionally gripped onto Remus' lapels tighter, his knuckles going almost white at the intensity of his grip. He nodded in response to Remus' suggestion, equally breathless and not trusting himself to speak for fear it would come out shaky or high pitched.

Remus smiled roguishly: a crooked smile that unwittingly set off a stampede of zoo animals in Sirius' stomach and sent a flock of birds coursing through his veins. Remus pushed them away from the door and surged forward, capturing Sirius's lips again in a hungry, bruising kiss – to which Sirius eagerly responded – and gently guiding him backwards towards the direction of Sirius' bedroom.

Their kiss grew heady and tongues battled for dominance as they made their way down the short hallway. They stumbled their way along attached by the lips, never once straying from each other even as they roughly pushed each other's muggle coats off and carelessly kicked off their shoes. Sirius nearly tripped over at one point but Remus managed to keep them both upright.

Every few steps, they heedlessly pushed one another up against the walls, snatching kisses or just using the time to touch one another over their suits; taking some time to feel and reacquaint themselves with each other. In all honesty, it hadn't really been that long since they had been together but the events of the day had really got Sirius thinking.

They had been to a funeral that day; the funeral of Diana Rosenfield, a muggle-born Order member who had been killed in battle a week earlier. The funeral had been quite sad and Sirius, although he hadn't really talked to her all that much or been good friends with her, had always thought of her as a strong fighter. The fact that the Death Eater's had claimed her had shaken him. It had got him thinking and he realised just how much the war was taking away from them.

He had suddenly realised the depth of the war and he just needed to **feel** something; something other than crushing realisation and bone-rattling anxiety. He needed to feel wanted and loved and that there was something that couldn't be taken away from him. He needed Remus and to know he had him. So, when the funeral had come to an end, they had stayed for a few after-funeral drinks with the rest of the Order members before Sirius had dragged Remus into the pub's toilets and they'd had a quick fumble. Sirius had then invited Remus back to his.

Although, truth be told, Remus was probably going to end up at his place anyways. The werewolf spent most of his nights, and some days, there. In fact, Remus had spent so much time at his flat that Sirius often found it a surprise when Remus **wasn't** there to greet him when he got home from work or an Order mission. Sirius had discovered that his flat felt **empty** whenever Remus wasn't there.

Sirius had even gone so far as to think about asking Remus to move in with him. He hadn't, though. And he hadn't for a couple of reasons. One reason was that he and Remus weren't actually anything of official status. They weren't partners or boyfriends. To everyone, they were just friends. But, to them, they were more than that. With the things they'd done to and with each other, they couldn't be **just** friends. And with the things Sirius felt for the other wizard, he didn't think Remus could ever just be his friend again.

Another reason was that he didn't know how Remus would react to it. Sirius had known Remus for years. So, he knew that the lycanthrope could be stubbornly independent and hellishly stubborn. Remus didn't like to be an inconvenience or rely on people more than he already did. So, Sirius hadn't gotten around to asking yet.

Sirius moaned into Remus' mouth, momentarily losing any and all clear thought when Remus did something indescribably amazing with his tongue and subsequently left him a moaning incoherent mess. Sirius didn't even realise they had stumbled into the bedroom until Remus, polite as ever, broke away ephemerally to shut the bedroom door.

Sirius used this distraction to take control and when Remus turned back to him, he yanked the lycanthrope flush against his body by the black tie around Remus' neck and reclaimed the wizard's lips for a quick but thorough snog while he shrugged his suit jacket off. He wasted no time in removing Remus' suit jacket, shoving it off his shoulders and letting it drop forgotten to the floor as he focused on the Muggle tie around Remus's neck.

"Fuckin' tie," Sirius muttered under his breath as he tugged at it, simultaneously unbuttoning the top two buttons of Remus' crisp white dress shirt.

Ever since that morning, since he'd seen Remus looking smart with his hair done neat-ish and in his almost-perfect-fit Muggle suit, he'd wanted to rip the tie off and ravage him. And now he could.

He yanked the silky tie hastily and unceremoniously off over Remus' head, not bothering to undo it completely – not that Remus complained – and threw it carelessly on the floor. He kissed Remus quickly before he went to work on the white dress shirt while Remus worked with more care on his tie, undoing it completely.

Sirius practically clawed at the buttons, scrambling to find and reveal and feel that fucking pale flesh hidden beneath the shirt. Ripping the last two buttons off in his haste, he reached his prize and finally allowed himself to slow down; his eyes and hands roamed leisurely across the fairly toned and slightly marred chest that he'd spent so much time mapping and knew to perfection.

Under his touch, Sirius could feel the rapid rise and fall of the other man's chest and the way Remus shivered with each gentle caress of his fingertips. He grinned to himself, relishing in the fact that he could make Remus react that way.

He touched the ivory skin as if he hadn't seen or felt another human in years, his fingers brushing lightly and almost hesitantly over the skin. His hands slid across Remus' nicely toned chest and over his stomach before moving up to his lightly-muscled arms and nape. Ducking his head slightly, he kissed the jagged white-almost-silver scar that lay over Remus' heart, conveying a silent message of love and trust that he wasn't sure if the werewolf would pick up on.

"Padfoot," Remus breathed, pushing a hand into Sirius' hair.

Sirius traced his tongue along the mark until Remus cupped his chin and brought his face up for lips to meet again. The kiss, however, was not as vivacious or animalistic as it had been only minutes before. Instead it was sweet and gentle and Sirius often used these kisses as a substitute for the words he hadn't said yet. It reminded Sirius of those that they usually gave after sex or after Order missions. He wondered if maybe Remus felt the same emotions behind each kiss, too.

Kissing back, Sirius allowed Remus to rid him of his shirt, letting the other man slowly slip it off his shoulders and onto the ground elegantly. Remus' hands moved with purpose and searched his body, moving teasingly and unhurriedly over his chest and stomach and then around to his back. Fingertips left a fiery trail in their wake as they swept gracefully over Sirius' upper body. The strong hands soon came to rest on his waist and pulled him closer.

The tender kiss soon transformed into a needy and messy one as Sirius' need to have Remus and have him **now** steadily grew along with Remus'. The sweet kiss had only exaggerated his need for comfort and he mercilessly tore at Remus' belt. He fumbled with the clasp for a few seconds before he growled and decided he needed to see what he was doing. He extracted his lips and tongue to look down at the belt and focus on getting it off **now**!

Remus kissed at his temple and chuckled, the low melodic sound sending shivers down Sirius' spine. He ignored it, though, as his unusually shaky hands fumbled at the belt. He heard Remus chuckle again and looked up to see the taller wizard's face smiling back.

"What?" he asked a little impatiently, wondering what on Earth was so funny?

"Bit eager, aren't you?" Remus teased, an infuriating smirk on his face.

"Shut up," Sirius ordered before he successfully pulled the belt through the loops and tore it away with a flourish and a _hiss_ , grinning smugly.

Remus raised a challenging eyebrow and Sirius threw the belt to the floor with a _thud_ before he pushed Remus away roughly making the other man stumble and fall back onto the bed. Sirius moved forward, unbuttoned Remus' trousers deftly and tugged them down the narrow hips. He pulled them off of the grinning wizard's body and threw them, without looking, over his shoulder in the general direction of the wardrobe.

He started working on his own button and zipper but stopped when manly hands wrapped around his and moved them to his side. Remus mumbled something that sounded like _'_ _Let me,'_ and began unbuttoning and unzipping Sirius' trousers for him, pushing them down his hips as Sirius breathed a small sigh of relief – glad of the release it gave to his previously trapped cock. He shucked the own trousers off his feet and climbed on top of Remus to straddle the other man.

Remus chuckled again but Sirius soon shut him up as he ground their clothed cocks together, creating a delicious friction that made Remus throw his head back and produce a low guttural moan that shot straight through to Sirius' very core and increased his arousal tenfold.

" **Fuck** ," Sirius gasped under his breath.

Remus grunted a noise of agreement and Sirius moved against Remus again, delighting in the sounds he was producing from the man beneath him, and smiling as the movement and heavy breathing with muttered curses brought back memories of their earlier days when they were just starting out together.

He crashed his lips into Remus' again, clumsy and sloppy but utterly pleasant, and grinned against the soft lips as he rocked his hips again and gained a strangled moan from the wizard beneath him. They worked like that for a few moments, just kissing messily and grinding their hips together in an effortless rhythm, both knowing the right moves after so long in their more-than-friendship and going with the usual flow.

Their clothed erections grew harder and harder as their activities grew hotter and heavier. The brilliant friction and heat created between them made it seem as if they had been made for each other – made to do this dance **together**. Suddenly, though, Sirius found himself lying on the bed underneath Remus with the taller wizard nestled between his legs.

Their lips tore apart with the movement and when Sirius opened his eyes, he found Remus grinning down at him triumphantly. Sirius didn't waste any more time. He wanted to taste Remus, to never stop. He reclaimed his lips, parting them and thrusting his tongue into the werewolf's mouth. He met no refusal, being kissed back just as fervently as Remus' tongue met his.

Sirius spread his legs just that little bit further to accommodate the taller wizard better, making the other man and himself more comfortable, and bringing their clothed pricks closer together again. It worked but Sirius soon found himself wanting more. He arched up, trying to get closer and create more divine friction.

" ** _Fuckfuckfuck_** ," Remus cursed against his lips making the Animagus smile proudly.

Sirius kissed Remus soundly on the lips and pulled away, resting his head on the mattress and staring up at the other man as they both tried to catch their breaths. He caught the darkened hazel-amber eyes of his more-than-friend and absentmindedly ran a hand through Remus' choppy hair creating a messy just-shagged look that he loved creating on the other man. It always made Remus seem more shaggable to him for some reason, he'd noticed.

His other hand ran carefully up and down Remus' back, over the knobbly spine and faintly prominent ribs, trying to feel as much of the other man as he could. Remus swallowed, almost audibly, as he looked down at Sirius; Sirius watched as his Adams Apple bobbed in his throat.

"You okay?" Remus asked, drawing Sirius' eyes back to his and Sirius could see a little bit of concern shining through them.

Sirius nodded and smiled faintly at the honest concern he could see in the other man's eyes as well as hear in his tone. "Fine. Just need a second to...you know... You?"

Remus nodded and sucked a kiss-swollen lip between his teeth – a sign that he was debating something – before he leant down and gave Sirius a sweet, chaste kiss. The next moment, he was sat back on his haunches, allowing Sirius room to shuffle up the bed and lean back against the pillows. Remus moved with him, sitting in front of him and Sirius noticed the other man watching him with a strange look in his eye – one that he realised Remus only ever wore for him.

"What?" Sirius asked when the intense gaze carried on for a while and made him feel a little exposed despite still being semi-clothed. He moved to sit upright, leaning on his elbows to view Remus easier.

Remus' mouth opened slightly, looking as if he was going to say something important before he closed his mouth and shook his head, giving a tight smile.

"Nothing," he said instead. Sirius wondered whether to ask but thought better of it. He knew that Remus was unlikely to voice his thoughts now. Besides, Remus would have told him if it was something important. "You calmed down enough now?"

Sirius nodded and Remus hooked his forefingers into Sirius' boxer shorts and slowly, attentively, dragged them down his legs before chucking them on the floor somewhere next to the bed. Sirius' erection jutted out proudly, flushed pink and standing to attention, and Sirius watched as Remus' eyes turned darker at the sight.

After a couple of still moments, Remus tore his eyes away from Sirius' cock and fixed them on Sirius. Hazel-amber caught stormy grey as Remus climbed up the bed and hovered on all fours over Sirius, carefully making sure that not one inch of their bodies touched. They stared at each other for a couple of breathless, time-suspended seconds before Remus leaned down and kissed him sweetly.

Sirius grazed Remus' lips, inwardly thanking the Gods that Remus kissed him when he did because he could feel the words he knew to be true bubbling up and threatening to spill out of his mouth. He could feel the truth wanting to be let out, wanting to be **heard**. But he didn't let his mouth run away, and instead kissed Remus back ardently.

Sirius hadn't said those words yet. Not to himself and certainly not to Remus. He'd come to terms with it, those feeling for his friend-turned-lover. He had come to accept, a little while ago, that he was in love with Remus Lupin; but that didn't mean it was easy to **say**. He didn't know how Remus would react to those words. Or if Remus even felt the same way.

Sirius and Remus kissed each other slowly and passionately, still separated so that not one part of their bodies was touching apart from their lips. They kissed knowingly and languidly, tasting each other as hands began to roam, generously feeling bare skin and eliciting keening noises from one another. After a few sweet, gentle seconds, Sirius pulled away and rested his head on the pillow. He watched Remus for a second; taking in the lust-blown pupils, mussed up hair and faint pink hue on his cheeks.

"Get your boxers off then," Sirius said finally, a small smile playing on his lips.

Remus smiled wickedly back before he obliged and quickly rid himself of his boxer shorts. Before they'd even hit the floor, he was leaning over Sirius again. Sirius linked his arms around Remus' back and pulled the other wizard down to rest his weight on top of him. Remus allowed himself to gravitate towards Sirius and lay atop him, crashing their lips together once again and kissing hungrily. Lips slid together sensuously and tongues danced and played together.

Remus moved against him and Sirius could feel the other man's erection against his hip, hot and hard; Remus was just as hard as he was. Teasingly, he rolled his hips and was granted with a tortured grunt from Remus.

Sirius opened his eyes and locked onto Remus'; stormy, rapidly darkening grey met already darkened hazel-amber and they stared at each other for a long moment before Remus pulled back and grabbed the tangled bedsheets at the bottom of the bed (Sirius never bothered to tidy his bed) and flung it over the lower halves of their bodies.

Sirius chuckled at the show of modesty; it wasn't as if anyone was going to barge in and find them. But Remus still liked to be covered and Sirius didn't argue. When he had covered them, Remus stared at Sirius for another moment before the Animagus rolled his eyes exasperatedly and sighed.

"Why are you stalling?" he asked.

"I'm not stalling," Remus replied quickly.

"Well, then. Get on with it and fuck me, yeah?"

Remus' eyes darkened and became almost completely amber at Sirius' words; Sirius felt a charge as the reaction he got from Remus went straight to his groin. Remus muttered something and Sirius felt the well-known odd oily sensation down south. It was odd, he realised, being lubed up by magic compared to it being done manually (in the Muggle way). The magical way always felt more urgent. And Sirius felt it was appropriate, since that was what he was feeling: urgency; like he needed Remus immediately. And, apparently, Remus needed him just as bad.

Remus grabbed a pillow and shoved his kindly under Sirius' hips and Sirius, in turn, spread his legs wider so Remus could settle himself between them comfortably. Putting one arm next to Sirius' head to keep his balance, Remus used to other to prepare Sirius.

"Ready?" Remus asked.

Sirius smiled and nodded, still amazed that Remus still asked even after all this time. Remus nodded back and quickly licked his lips before he slipped a finger inside Sirius right down to the knuckle. Sirius let out a breath as the finger entered him and tried to relax against the intrusion. It felt odd, as it usually did, but not unpleasant. Never unpleasant, not with Remus. He waited a couple of brief seconds before nodding his head at Remus who took the unspoken message and slipped a second finger in.

That one did feel a little uncomfortable but Sirius persevered and kept his breathing steady. He watched as Remus worked on stretching him, gentle fingers moving in and out, and in a scissoring motion. The slightly furrowed brow of concentration and deep care in Remus' eyes made Sirius feel something warm and comfortable deep in his gut.

With the soft look on Remus' face and in his actions, Sirius couldn't help but thread his fingers through the other man's hair and pull him in for a kiss. Remus paused in his actions, seemingly distracted by Sirius and the heartfelt kiss that Sirius had been substituting for whenever the need to tell Remus those three words surfaced.

Soon enough, Remus gathered his wits again and continued scissoring whilst slowly, affectionately peppering Sirius with little kisses. He eventually slipped a third finger in and Sirius' breath caught in his throat as he felt the slight burn. Remus paused, giving him time to adjust but Sirius ignored the miniscule pain as best he could and returned the previously sweet kiss, quickly turning it into a one full of need and want – a kiss that could take his mind off the current intrusion in his body.

They kissed hungrily and Remus began moving his fingers tentatively. Sirius could feel the digits probing carefully, searching for the soft set of sensitive nerves that made Sirius see stars. Remus crooked his fingers and an abrupt jolt of electricity coursed through Sirius' body, making his eyes snap shut at the suddenness of it and making him arch up under Remus, increasing his arousal once again whilst also alerting the werewolf that he had found his goal.

"Shit," Sirius gasped, eyes snapped shut and fingers unintentionally gripping Remus' hair tighter as the sparking sensations coursed through his body and increased his senses. All he could hear and feel and smell was Remus.

Sirius opened his eyes, grey latching onto the amber-hazel above him as Remus' fingers moved away from his prostate. Remus pushed his fingers in deeper, watching Sirius with a sort of awe, and brushed over the spongy set of nerves again. Sirius unthinkingly fisted Remus' hair tighter and pulled the other man's face closer, moaning loudly against his lips as Remus brushed over his prostate again before he pulled the lycanthrope into a sloppy kiss.

Sirius' swallowed and caught the awe-stricken amber-hazel gaze of his bed-mate again. "Fuck me," he breathed. "Now."

Remus wasted no time; he removed his fingers quickly and muttered the incantation to lube his own cock up. He stroked his length a couple of times before rubbing some lubricant on Sirius' hard-on.

Sirius groaned at the loss of Remus filling him but it was soon lost as the blunt head of Remus' dick appeared at his entrance. He spread his legs further and shifted on the pillow under his hips to get more comfortable, not wanting to waste any more time and just wanting Remus in him as soon as possible. He jutted his hips up a little, encouraging Remus to go ahead.

Laboured breathing and mumbled curse words punctuated the air as Remus slowly and smoothly slid in, the lube and preparation making it easier. Breath catching at first (as it always did, which made Sirius smile – pleased that he had that effect on the wizard **every single time** ), Remus watched Sirius as he did so.

He took his time, allowing Sirius intervals every now and again then to get used to the fulfilment. Darkened amber-hazel held onto impassioned stormy grey as they both breathed in and out in time with one another. Sirius' heartrate thumped loudly in his ears, so loud that he was sure Remus could hear it. Hell, he was sure the lady on the floor below could probably hear it.

 _Slowly, slowly, slowly_ Remus moved until he was buried deep within Sirius. The lycanthrope paused when he was buried completely in Sirius, waiting and allowing them both time to catch their breaths. Their heavy, quick breathing created their own unique chorus that blocked out other noise from the busy streets outside.

Sirius kept his eyes locked onto Remus' and leant forward for a quick kiss before he wrapped one arm around Remus' neck to pull him closer while the other held onto Remus' bicep. As much as he loved Remus just surrounding and being inside of him, he needed more. He wrapped one leg around Remus' waist and stared deep into his eyes.

"Move," he commanded breathlessly, his voice a lot huskier than usual, and Remus complied.

Thrusting his hips in and out, slowly and tentatively at first, Remus set up a steady rhythm that they were both comfortable with. As they settled into a steady pace, Remus became more confident with his thrusts. The friction and timing of the thrusts had Sirius writhing helplessly and eventually he found the pace to be too slow. Painstakingly so. His desire grew more and more, his cock rubbing heatedly between their stomachs, and he felt he needed more. He wrapped his other leg around Remus' waist, hanging onto the other man, and tightened them, hoping somehow to have more of Remus – to have **all** of Remus in him.

" **Faster** ," Sirius mumbled under his breath.

Remus obliged once again, his thrusts becoming deeper and faster and ever so slightly harder as hips crashed into hips and their need increased along with the new pace. The sound of sweat-slicked skin slapping against sweat-slicked skin along with hissed profanity and heavy, quick pants filled the room; it created their own chorus and made Sirius' ears attuned to the sounds of only them.

They soon settled into another steady pace – slow for a couple of thrusts then fast for a few then slow again then fast. Sirius knew it well – it was a rhythm they both knew well; one that was theirs and theirs alone.

Sirius met every thrust with the same strength and force as Remus and when Remus suddenly, ever-so-slightly, changed the angle, Sirius lost his mind completely.

" ** _Fuck_** ," he groaned.

Toes curled and his eyes snapped shut involuntarily as white light shot out behind his eyelids. Remus had found the **magic spot** again and with every snap of his hips, the werewolf was hitting it dead on. Sirius met every thrust desperately, eagerly and with every cant of his hips, the pleasure continued in waves. And soon enough, he could feel it.

Sirius had temporarily forgotten about his own aching need, too distracted by Remus and all of the awe-inspiring feelings the other man was provoking in him. He had, somehow, forgotten that he was as hard as rock but he remembered now. Remus hitting his prostate with every thrust had increased his own arousal and he could feel the insatiable **need** to come for and with Remus.

"Rem…I'm – **Fuck!** – c-close," he warned.

Remus grunted back and Sirius knew that was the closest thing to a reply he was going to get to being 'same'. Words often seemed to abandon Remus when they had sex, Sirius had noticed. It made him feel oddly proud of himself for reducing a usually eloquent Remus to an unspeaking inarticulate mess of lust and want.

Suddenly, Sirius could tell. He could feel not only his own imminent release but Remus' too. He could **literally** feel it. He felt it as the muscles on Remus' back tensed and could tell in the way the other man's brow creased ever-so-slightly and adorably like it did when he was concentrating. He could feel it as Remus' thrusts got more urgent and powerful, occasionally knocking out of their steady rhythm as his need took over, before Remus managed to reign in his primal instincts and set their pace right again.

With one last messy but perfect kiss on the lips, Remus moved slightly to rest on one elbow again, his chest brushing against Sirius' and his face buried in the crook of Sirius' neck, peppering it with little kisses. Sirius' hand – the one that had had a death grip on Remus' bicep – moved to hold onto Remus' shoulder blade, pulling the other man closer whilst also allowing Remus' other hand to move from the other side of his body and reach between them to grasp at his cock. Their rhythm never changed through all of the readjusting.

Remus ran his thumb over the tip, spreading the pearly pre-come there and providing some extra lubrication along with the sweat on Remus' palm and previous lubrication. Stroking in long languid strokes, Remus steadily brought Sirius closer to the edge; Remus' hand began pumping at the same furious pace as their hips and Sirius could feel the need to come rushing towards him.

"F-fuck…"

He could feel it coming; could feel his release tightening like a coil in his stomach and threatening to snap. The feeling was building and building and he knew that any second now, he was going to come. But he didn't want to come without Remus. So, he met Remus' thrusts urgently and ran his fingers aimlessly up and down the other man's back and through his hair.

Coming closer and closer to orgasming, Sirius clenched around Remus and smiled indulgently at the plethora of swear words spilling uncontrollably from the lycanthrope's lips, caused by him. Remus' pace picked up along with his ministrations with his hand and Sirius felt as if he was in heaven.

"Moony... **Fuck**!"

Sirius' legs tightened around Remus' hips like a vice and he briefly wondered how Remus was even still able to move, sure his legs were trapping the wizard; apparently they weren't, though. His long legs wrapped around Remus' waist only seemed to encourage him to delve deeper with each thrust and hit the spot again and again, and in the process sent Sirius into a mindless haze of feeling. It would only be a matter of time before he exploded, he knew as he insistently met Remus' thrusts.

"Remus..." Fuck, Remus really was amazing, he thought to himself. "I..." Remus flicked his wrist in a way that made Sirius arched up and writhe underneath him. Unthinkingly, he allowed his mind to roam free as one of his hands tightened in Remus' hair, the other holding onto Remus and pulling Remus' chest flush against his own. Remus' breath was heavy on his neck, puffing over the wetness from the other man's previous kisses and sending shivers through Sirius' body. Sirius could tell that Remus was just as close as he was.

" **Fuck** …Remus, I…" In his hazy mind, Sirius vaguely recognised feelings of love and devotion and a desire to have a future with Remus. In his haze, he vaguely registered the words bubbling up but he couldn't find it in himself to stop himself and continue to hide it.

"Remus…" Remus twisted is wrist just so. " ** _Fuck!_** I love you," he murmured unintentionally, allowing his thoughts to be released and reveal themselves as he came all over his and Remus' stomachs, spilling his seed over Remus' hand and arching up beneath the other wizard.

He briefly noticed the slight momentary stutter in Remus' thrusts but he was too busy riding his own release out to focus too much on it. He thrust back desperately as he rode his orgasm out and by the next thrust, he felt Remus join him in the height of orgasmic bliss.

Remus continued with small thrusts throughout his own orgasm and bit down lightly on Sirius' shoulder, muffling his own moans against the skin. Sirius responded lazily to the small thrusts, having finished his own orgasm, until Remus finally finished and collapsed heavily on top of him, burying his face further into the crook of Sirius' neck and panting heavily.

They stayed like that for a little while, both men completely spent and perfectly sated, slowly regaining the strength in their limbs as well as earning their breaths and minds back. Remus lay on top of Sirius while Sirius drew little nonsensical patterns on the lycanthrope's back with his fingers. Sirius was fine to stay like that – Remus never really did weigh all that much despite his height and lightly toned body – but Remus decided to move and let his spent cock slip out of Sirius.

Sirius, somehow, managed to find the energy to groan at the loss but it didn't last long as he lay back happily against the pillows and watched Remus. Remus grabbed his wand from his trousers on the floor and muttered some cleaning spells, ridding both himself and Sirius of Sirius' come and any leftover lube. During all of this, Sirius wondered what the werewolf was thinking. Or what he was going to do next.

With a sudden, stomach plummeting realisation, it dawned on him. What he'd said. He closed his eyes and grimaced slightly as he realised he couldn't have picked a more inopportune moment to blurt out that he loved Remus Lupin, could he?

 ** _Shit_** , he thought. He'd just admitted it. He hadn't meant to – hadn't meant to blurt it out like that, not then. **_Fuck_** , he cursed mentally. There was definitely no way Remus didn't hear it. Recalling the slight stutter Remus had had straight after he'd said it, he knew there was no way that Remus hadn't heard it. Admittedly, it had only been a momentary millisecond pause, but it was still a pause. Which meant Remus **must** have heard it. Otherwise, what else would have thrown him off balance?

As far as Sirius could see it, he had two options. Either he admitted that it was the truth and apologised for saying it or he could wait and see for Remus' reaction before he excused his words. It didn't take him long to reach a decision. He pulled the pillow out from under his hips and threw it carelessly onto the floor before he pushed his other pillow up against the headboard.

Option two, he decided. That would probably be best option, he reckoned. If Remus reacted well to what he said, then great, they could move on to being more than just fuck-buddies. And, if Remus reacted badly to what he said, well, then he could say that it was a spur of the moment thing. That way, he could still have Remus in some way, even if Remus didn't reciprocate the feelings. Having Remus for sex was better than not having Remus at all, he reckoned.

He sat up slightly, resting against his pillow against the headboard and leaned over to the bedside table as Remus lay back down on the bed, one plump pillow beneath his head (the other now on the floor). Sirius plucked up a pack of Muggle cigarettes and picked one out before putting it to his lips. Snapping his fingers in front of it, the cigarette lit up instantly.

He relaxed back against his pillow and drew in some smoke as he watched Remus from the corner of his eye. The other man simply lay there on the pillow, staring up at his ceiling. Sirius didn't know how the night was going to end, what with him being a complete idiot and letting slip one of the biggest secrets he'd been holding in since seventh year, but he was sure it was going to be a defining night.

* * *

 **NOTE: Yes, this was my first attempt at writing anything M-themed. Please be kind =)  
Written on 28.11.16 (and other days. Edited on 22.12.16)**

 **Anyway, thanks for reading! Hope you liked it =)**


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